The Last Thing I Remembered Was

I wrote this in my writing group during a writing exercise about "The last thing I remembered was": The last thing I remembered was the light coloring beautiful shades of blue. The chlorine singeing my nostrils as they struggled for air. Sinking further down, the back of my father turning from body to distorted colors of bright white and pink. If really did move in slow motion, the milliseconds drifting in a timelessness away as you accept the inability to grab life from the water. My father wanted to know why. Why I had drifted to the deep end. Why I had gotten out of my floating tube. But through broken coughs and gasps for breath I could only mutter that I did not know. Four year olds aren’t suicidal, but there is a strange curiosity that allows you to do things you know you will regret. The temptation to step off a high bridge, step into rapids or traffic. Maybe that is what spurred people to create bungee jumping or white water rapids, the reclaiming of child innocence even about things we should be afraid of. That as we age, we become more aware of consequences. The last think I remember about almost drowning in a hotel pool in Mexico is that I didn’t seem to care.

Editorial on AU's South Africa's Study Abroad

http://www.theeagleonline.com/news/2004/09/23/ Opinions/au.Abroad.On.Downward.Spiral-728254.shtml Editorial in response to article about problems with AU's South African Program

John Mayer is a Stud

So First John Mayer writes a Song, "Your Body is a Wonderland." which is the one of the greatest pick-up songs ever... What women wouldn't sleep with him if he had a guitar and sung that song to her... Your body is a wonderland, briliant Than he writes some song, "Why Georgia" or something about love Now "Daughter" because every women has issues at some time with her mother... so why not write a nice song telling mothers to appreciate their daughters and get all those girls to love you even more, by understanding that sometimes percarious relationship He might be the SMOOTHEST WHITE BOY EVER... No wonder the brothers love him...

4th of July- again

So I wrote this on the 4th and just found that I forgot to post it, so here it is, a little late, better late then never: I was listening to NPR and I heard something I never thought of before: “The celebration is not of a successful battle or conquest, but rather of liberation of the minds by paper, by words. Our revolution is that of a declaration of freedom.” What a testament to our country, to our forefathers that our day of liberation is that of the mind, not that of an army. Something I think people of all political persuasions forget. Many people like to proclaim their love for this country, drench their body in a flag and send young men and women to war to “liberate,” while never facilitating the most important liberation, their minds. Others talk about anti-war, and anti-globalization and have so much disdain for the symbols, anthems and country that gives them the political and equally important economic freedom to do so. Both sides miss the point. This country is great because of its ideas, not just because of those who are willing to die for all of our freedoms but also those who are willing to die for its promise. When I see the flag, I remember my parents and grandparents. Not just because my mother and grandfather serve in the armed services and were sent to war for me. But because my parents and grandparents were willing to march to bring me those freedoms they put their lives on the line for. Because my father had the guts to say no to Vietnam and instead serve orphaned children in NYC. Because my grandmother was willing to go to college, when all that could be expected was servitude to an inequitable society. When I think of the 4th of July, I think of Crispus Attucks being the first to give his life for this idea of a free country, did not include freedom for him. I am thankful for this country cause for all its faults, its great its diversity. Where we must constantly confront the changing makeup of our society. While other nations are fragmenting by their ethnic differences, we demand that our society incorporate them. I always remember Abbie Hoffman, Chicago 8 said (paraphrase) the reason he spends so much fighting this country is because he loves it so much and wants it to be all it can be.

A wrong Comment on Male Sexuality

One of my friend’s Elizabeth has a interesting project for her social research class, “I am interested in learning if people's amount of sexual education during high school affected their decisions, or if they were more concerned with their personal morals.” She went on to say that in a study conservatives were found to have “wilder” sex than liberals because they have more orgasms. To which I would chalk up to the subversion of their sexuality they have to do in their public lives, or that their significant others need to lie to make their republican other feel better, while as liberals of course are more prone to have grown up conversations on their sexuality. “yes dear you are wonderful…. No I never fake it… No Georgie I did have 10 orgasms tonight you were great.” But then a self-proclaimed progressive, or anarchist or whatever in word we are today, says, “I personally want to know want percentage of dorm sex is fulfilling vs. regrettable and self-effacing to women who buy the ‘all guys are gay or taken’ mythology. And if self-esteem has anything to do with it.” That is so offensive, to believe that after being in College you could believe that there are these helpless women being prayed upon by steroid riddled college men. Women are perfectly capable of making informed decisions about their sexual partners and if anything college women are making these decisions on the same culturally defined definitions of beauty that men are. Both sexes are being devalued in their self-esteem, as proof that men can claim that other men are just predators, and women could believe that other women are not empowered enough to make decisions for themselves.The reason I am so mad about this obviously obnoxious cliché is that these stupid myths of how men and women interact, have unfortunate impact on real relationships, even though they share no value with reality. The comment devalues men into a stereotypical sex driven maniacs willing to put our penises into anything, and women helpless victims devalued by Cosmo and Teen Girl. Women in today’s society are empowered just like men. And most are abstaining from sex until they themselves have decided what they want. Most are not making rash decisions, but decisions of their choosing. Are their regrets, of course, people make mistakes. Life and culture affect how we see ourselves and how we view our sexuality. But if people are have unfulfilling sexual encounters because we as a society do not encourage healthy exploration of our sexual selves, because we have a narrowing view of beauty, and continue to push negative clichés and stereotypes of men and women. Instead of using the feminist movement to expand our acceptance divergent roles of sexuality, there has been a homogenizing of sexuality. Downgrading masculinity as crude and sex craven. Assigning certain sexuality as MALE and sensuality as FEMALE. This of course is all not true. Women desiring sex is normal and wanted, and men can be masculine and sensual. Between metrosexuals, air brushed heartthrobs, and lack of teaching boys about depth of feelings, I don’t think men know who they are anymore and are unsure of who they are supposed to be. Combine that with no education on how we should interact with the opposite sex, and neither gender feeling comfortable with their own beauty or sexuality and you get a bad situation. (we haven’t even touched upon the centuries of devaluing women have had to endure and the continued negative culturalizations mothers make their daughter endure).

My autobiography is going to be called: Confessions of an almost metrosexual or To Pessimistic to be a Visionary

My Grandma

“That’s my boy.” “Which one is he Norma?” “The cute one laying next to that girl.” “But he’s black” “I know, my son Dean married a Black woman and became Jewish.” “Jewish, oh, that’s too bad guess he’s not coming here.” “Barbara.” “Just kidding. He’s cute, he looks nothing like you though.” “I don’t know, I think I had dreadlocks just like his when I was young.” Her spirit lightened as she watched Jordan roll over caressing the girl, an eye poking out of his eyelid caught his hand moving over her curves. The Earth’s rotation allowed the sun to start peering through the window. “And he never knew you?” “Nope, I died before he was born, my George says he was a good kid, always nice. Not around much though. Family never warmed up to him being black and Dean turnin Jewish. But he is beautiful none the less.” Jordan allowed a smile to peek out of his face as he slowly rose from the bed; one hand rustling his head the other scratching his ass. Dolores soul brightened even more, “ha ha, he does that every morning.”

Undecided Voters

I am the undecided voter that people keep talking about. I know what you are thinking... Jordan? Mr. obnoxiously opinionated, Mr. Pragmatism, Mr. would never compromise ideals and vote Republican or third party. But I am that voter that does not like Bush, but am not sure if I can make it to voting for John Kerry. A true poll (not the ones published by the newspaper or the TV) found that the majority of undecided voters were voters who do not like Bush but cannot bring themselves to vote for Kerry. Of course many are people who voted for Bush before, or “moderates” although lets call them what they are… Stupid people who can’t be bothered to know more about the candidates that ten second snippets. For example I read an “undecided moderate voter” said I want to know more about John Kerry’s Health Care Plan. Well of course it is out, has been since the primaries, in fact they had an ENTIRE DEBATE ABOUT IT. Its online, its pretty easy to find out… Now the media is partially to blame, as they do nothing to talk about issues… But honestly, don’t vote, you’re an idiot. That being said, I don’t know how I will vote. And so I have an apology…. Sarah, I am sorry. We once had an argument about third parties, and while she tried to explain that she understood my stance on pragmatism and the deception of Nader, that some people feel left out of the system and for them Nader is the only one speaking to them…. I was unfortunately dismissive. While I still have that fire for pragmatism, and the need for working the system to help black people, I can’t help but feel like the Democratic party is not and will not under Kerry work for us. I could go on about Nader and how we will never speak to the black community and why he represents what is wrong with progressives, I will stick to my point Sarah, I am sorry.

Capitalism and Community

The ironic thing about the market economy or modern capitalistic society is that it is based on community and the realization of our interdependence. In truth specialization is the consciousness that we can accomplish more as a group or community than we can simply doing things as self interested individuals. In that sense capitalism is built on community and thus exploitation of that community even more heinous.

Black Republicans on Parade, Return of the Black Face?

Your skin color does not dictate how you see the world, but it undeniably assures a shared experience with those of the same skin pigmentation. In this race conscious caste system when you come from one of the singled out and historically oppressed races, you should know better than to be a republican and most of us do. Maryland Lt. Governor Steele (a fellow darker skinned American) said that it is racist to assume that just because a person is Black they are a democrat. That color should not dictate political affiliation. I agree, he could be a green party candidate. In the real world, Black American have an obligation to working toward ending the significance of their shared pigmentations. Although it may be good to have moderating voices in the republican party, Black “Republicans” should know better and not stand with this party and this president that have traded real conservative values with using fear to govern, hate to divide, and economic starvation to feed their greed and power hunger. This party, this administration clearly have no regard for the poor or minorities and for either to speak up for them now, they should be ashamed.

Bush Speaks Tonight

In Honor of George W. Bush speaking tonight I think you should watch the Daily Show's video on Bush's past 4 years... it is really funny and really worth it click HERE and go to George W. Bush's Words on the right hand side This is what I think of that :

Republican Convention in NYC

Watching the Republican Convention in NYC and watching them talk endlessly about September the 11th made me think: Its ironic that the people so blood thirsty for revenge for the 9/11 attacks on NYC and Washington DC that they will support any policy cloaked in that aim, are the same people who would find the majority of those victims’ lifestyles and morality, abhorrent. Equally ironic is the President going to war to protect cities his policies destroy without bombs. And “protect” us from men whose conservative fundamentalist values more closely match President Bush’s own then they do the residents of those cities.